My last day in home was a
week before (forget the time difference, haha). I made the decision to study
abroad two years ago, but on last Wednesday, I still didn’t feel any sense of
reality. Yes, what I was going to live in another side of Earth, where was too
far away. I was nervous, but I had no idea what I was worried about, the uncertainty
of the future? Leaving my parents and friends?I felt that in the two years
I prepared for going abroad, someone used a cloth to cover my eyes, and now it
was time for him to take down the cloth and force me to open my eyes.
Another two days later, I
arrived Rochester. Two of our program assistants met us at the airport. Everything
in front of me is new and unfamiliar. I always imagined how my life in the US
would be. I would sit on grass and see the sunset. I would go to the Ontario seaside
and spend a day watching the sea tides all day. I would do research in an
advanced lab and speak English fluently to communicate with my partners. But,
the reality was that I had to take down my two 20kg-baggages from the luggage
claim.
It was really late that night
when we got in the dormitory. However, because of jet lag, I didn’t sleep for
the whole night. I missed my parents. I talked to my friend at 4:00. It was tolerant
to have insomnia.
I met other students next
day, and our trip to beach was coming. But I was sleepy and nervous; it was
hard for me to get excited. I walked along the seaside with my roomie quietly.
After a while, we saw other students and PA sit together and played who is the
Mafia. (Actually, I thought this game was only played in China.) It was awesome
to play a familiar game with a group of people you were not familiar with. I
joined the game. Time passed quickly, and I had a wonderful afternoon because I
found I was kind like immersing in this group, which was a hopeful sign that I
will have the sense of belonging someday.
It's so interesting to read about expectations and how they differ from reality -- especially when you've been thinking about what something will be like for two years! I always feel like it's just me who thinks things will be one way, but they turn out to be sort of that way, and sort of different in ways we didn't expect and think about. For example, when you talk about daydreaming of sitting in the grass and watching the sunset and the reality is that you have to get your heavy suitcase down. It's so funny how we forget the day to day stuff is always there, even when big changes are happening. But it's also great isn't it? Because we also get to play games and get to know people. I like also how you describe being a bit anxious about the beach, but then how fun it was anyway. I feel like I know that feeling well.
ReplyDeleteI really like the aptly named title of your blog post. I think this really gets at the mix of emotions one feels when they make such momentous decisions to take on new paths in life. I like the shuffle of ideas between expectations and reality. When you say "[i]t was tolerant to have insomnia" do you mean that this was an acceptable thing given the situation? Or perhaps something else? My sense is that it would be expected, but as a reader I feel as though you might have intended something more.
ReplyDeleteOh, I'm sorry. This is a typing mistake. I wanted to type "intolerant", but missed the first two letter. �� But since I survived the long and upset night, actually the insomnia was "tolerant".
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